Well, now that the Subpar Bowl is finished, we can get on to talking about the important stuff, namely, the ads and how Coke really stepped into it this time! By investing in Apartheid South Africa? Whoops! that was the '80s! Silly me! No, they really stepped into it by having a multi-lingual ad. I mean it would be bad enough if it was only "bi"!
Anyhow, different languages to sing "America" is an affront to all things 'Merican...not sure why. I was wondering if they were going to use any Indigenous American languages in the ad, but maybe that would be rubbing it in? Well, that and the fact that they don't represent a big enough demographic
Anyway, people were upset because "how could they do this to our national anthem?!" (Wait, you mean it isn't that Lee Greenwood song?) Assuming that "America" is the national anthem is an affront to us here in Baltimore, home of the actual national anthem. Okay, maybe we should speed it up a bit and add some crunch, or as my oldest son recommends, some "dub", but still I love it! I love that it ends in a question mark! I love that it was mostly stolen from an English drinking song! I love mostly that it was written in Baltimore, when our original parent country was bombing the shit out of us! (I think they were givin' us some Shock and Awe by the usage of their "smart cannons.")
As an historical aside, I think the War of 1812 was actually started because our mascot took a shit on Upping Street, and no one bothered to clean it up and then it got tracked all over the house. Burning the capital and blasting Mobtown was the equivalent of pounding on our bedroom door.
Anyway, Francis Scott Key, (named after the bridge) wrote that song, while a captive on one of the British ships. One of the fellow prisoners next to Key, an Ensign Sherman, saw the US Flag still flying over McHenry at the crack of dawn and got all up in the leader of the British fleet's ye olde grill. Captain Crabtree had no recourse but to let his prisoners go, call the War a tie, and go home. The English agreed to relax some of the tariffs on American goods going to Europe, and the Americans agreed to not say too much about the English and their really bad teeth. So few Americans truly know our own history.
Well, that's all the yarn-spinnin' for now, I'm gonna go lay down!