So if you haven't seen or heard through general conversation, the Facebook posts, billboard signs, and/or ads on AM radio, I am now a dog owner. Currently, me and the missus are parents to 1 and a half dogs. The half? It's a step-dog that we have implied-custody to. It's a very emotional and potentially legally difficult issue, I have probably said too much already, I'll have to check with our lawyers.
We got the new dog, because the kids are now teenagers, and we wanted something, young, small and cute, that we could hug and adore that eventually wouldn't talk back or ask to borrow the car. It's also a nostalgia thing, as we're now house training, we've gotten to have many of the similar discussions about shit like days of yore.
Like being parents of kids, it's a strange cult. The Dog-People at work have already begged and then practically demanded that I show them pictures. It felt like I was doing them a favor, but that's really just an insidious trap. Once I showed them the pictures, I expected at least two or three sentences worth of doting, and at least one prolonged "aw" as mandatory. It wasn't until I realized that I expected them to do this, that I understood the trap sprung. I of course returned the favor, as they showed me pictures of their "babies", thus reinforcing their own cult dependence. We're a sick bunch.
I now talk to my dogs and expect them to understand what I'm saying, why? I have no idea. I've developed a bizarre sense of pride when someone praised their appearance this weekend. I'm sure there would have been a decades-long feud, if they had said anything caustic. I haven't got the bumpersticker that says, " I heart my mutt" or "Ask me about my rescue dog", but it's only a matter of time.
Okay, gotta go follow my kids around outside with a plastic bag, and then drive down to Hampden and drop it off in Benn's trashcan!