This year, we asked Shank readers and contributors what their favorites of 2015 were without the whole rigmarole of creating a list. We also asked them to give a few sentences what made it their favorite. These are the results.
FAVORITE BALTIMORE WILL BE OKAY AGAIN MOMENT
AMANDA BLYTHE KROTKE: The march of college students that went up Calvert Street in a show of unity days after the unrest. People brought their children and there were all walks of life there and bystanders were on edge, only to be met with such a touching show of love and humanity and survival.
FAVORITE UNINTENDED RESULT OF ALL THE NEGATIVE PUBLICITY AGAINST BALTIMORE THIS YEAR
AMANDA BLYTHE KROTKE: It just confirmed for the D.C. people that they don't want to come here. Fine by me. Keep your sanctimonious haughty attitudes over there.
BIGGEST SURPRISE: SHEILA DIXON
AMANDA BLYTHE KROTKE: The biggest surprise to me is how forgiving Baltimoreans are, at least when it comes to Sheila Dixon. She's shockingly popular.
2015 Best of: It's the Little Things..
by STEVE MESSICK
Another year in the books! We start in January, completely fresh, and then, faster than an out-of-wedlock Palin pregnancy, it's the end of December already!
This year did bring it's gifts, whether it was enjoying the relative coolness of the new Pope, (who also had that new Pope smell), or Ms. Paltrow giving helpful advice on the benefits of a mugwort-steamed vagina!
I learned that NFL cheerleaders don't even get paid minimum wage, (you'd think a league with billions of dollars could afford that). Fortunately, in California, they have received workplace rights. Psst! Mr. Goodell, if you want to appeal to that growing female market, you might want crack open that wallet before you get more bad PR on this matter. In fact, it might not be a bad idea to let the real refs come back as a union. I don't think you'd have to watch that decision of yours be reversed like so many others, which has to be deflating.
We discovered that Stonehenge was really just part of a larger Striphenge. No doubt this was to provide convenience, no longer having to run across the village to different henges.
Cecil the Lion was killed, yet an armadillo deflected a bullet non-lethally back into his attempted shooter.
We learned that the phrase, "Fuck that Alligator," is a fun statement, just as long as you remain on dry land.
[Ed. Note: both the dude who yelled "Fuck that alligator" and then jumped into the water only to be promptly eaten but said gator and the man who shot at the armadillo only to receive a head injury from the ricochet were both from Texas - the state which just passed new open-carry gun legislation.]
Bill Murray still has the comedic chops, effortlessly able to craft one of the best SNL skits by making Jaws into a love story. Others, in spite of their efforts were unable to summon fire to stop marriage equality, or insects to attack a perceived despot.
We were treated to a masterful sequel to Mad Max and were finally given the Pogues' Whiskey, not sure how that one took so long.
So, we say goodbye to 2015, should it be with a sad wave? a slow Adele-esque ballad? That's your choice, me? I'm doin' the Cha-Cha Bitch!